Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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