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this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
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