I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
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At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
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A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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