you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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