Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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