yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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