So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
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