a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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