I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize