i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
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