ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Based on my calculations, I should be blackout by approximately 11:14pm and that's when I need you to take my phone away from me. Mkay?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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