winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
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