Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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