"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heโs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Oh and itโs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ๐๐๐๐ฌ๐ณ๐
Randomize