Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
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We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
His girlfriend left him for the pizza guy. I am not fucking kidding.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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