Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Again. I'm very sorry I tried to poke your eye out. You've been aware of my inability to aim since day one.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize