...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize