I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
so much tequila, so little girl.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
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