He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize