So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Last night while we were having sex, 'God bless the USA' started playing on his itunes. He came almost immediately... so awkward.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
I just turned down the best booty call of my life because I have to make a cheesecake. I guess this is growing up.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Randomize