There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
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I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize