were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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