you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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