theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
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slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
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Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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