What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
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