Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
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