You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
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