Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
How does one acquire holy water?
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
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