big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
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