Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Randomize