Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
i think i just naturally attract stoners
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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