and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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