Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
He shit in the fireplace
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize