Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
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