She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
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I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
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Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Randomize