Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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