the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize