Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
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