you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize