he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize