Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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