i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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