Call me Kermit cause I'm about to go piggin
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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