Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize