if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
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