He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
Im shirtless eating a burrito. How urgent is this?
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
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