oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize