I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doing a walk of shame covered in blue food coloring is only embarrassing if you make it embarrassing...actually no its embarrassing on all accounts
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
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