Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
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