I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just deleted any ex boyfriends and potential lovers from my phone in preparation for Vegas...
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Randomize